There are times in every life when we feel hurt or alone... But I believe that these times when we feel lost and all around us seems to  be falling apart are bridges of growth.

We struggle and try to recapture the security of that was, but almost in pite of ourselves, we emerge on the other side with a new understanding, a new awareness, a new strength. It is almost as though we must go through the pain and struggle in order to grow and reach ne heights.

and yeah, i bet you have heard this one too...

"Love is like a butterfly the more you chase it, the
more it eludes you, but when you just let it go, it
will come to you the least you expect it"

TRUE? i don't know, but being the kind of person who
doesn't wait for miracles to happen.. the above
mentioned may work for me but being responsible for the
things you want to happen to you should be your
fundamental asset, it is mine.

not that it sickens me to wait but in my belief we
don't have soul mates, we are not destined for
someone.. unless we accept the fact that we could love
anybody, accept them that they are not perfect, but the
thing we could offer is loving them perfectly. do you
really think that if ever you indeed found your
soulmate, your relationship would be immune from
hardships, quarrels, misunderstandings... it would
still be, like i said... nothing is perfect.. but if we
are open to considering individual differences, then we
could at least say that it is almost perfect..

why wait in vain... hahah.. pointless

It's hard to accept, but you can't change the past. You can't go back and manipulate things to the way you wanted them to happen. Because life'd be meaningless and boring and just not worth living. But you can change the future and that's a beautiful thing about life. Yes, you will make mistakes. And yes, you will have bad days - but as long as you let the past go, you'll have such a gorgeous and bright future ahead of you. Knowing that things were meant to happen. Knowing that each day you will learn something so that you keep growing to be a better person. Life is like a rope, twined in all its complexities and yet weaved into one marvelous stream that you have the chance you use something amazing from. So grab hold of it.

Love is when you've waited
for all of what seems so long
Even when he's holding another
you still know that you belong

Love is when you hold your ground
when he's not by your side
You love him and see him for him
even though he lied.

Love is when your still yourself
while speaking your mind to him
And when you split you still know
he'll be back again

Love is when your closer
to family and friends
When he has made you stronger
and gave you the cure to mend

Love is when you give him space
and give him room to breathe
When he looks to you knowing
that you're the one who believes

Love is when you mean so much
and try your best to make him see
When you take the pain of being put down
and you are still happy

Love is when he comes back to you
realizing he was wrong
When he holds you and lets you know
that you're where he belongs....

One of the saddest thing that could possibly happened to you is when you know you both love each other but there is no happy ending waiting for you... esp. when both of you are already taken  it really hurts but life seems so cruel sometimes...

Hi friends sorry haven't been here for decades I guess  and I'll be away in a bit again... have to catch my children, they left home last monday and I need to be there next week, leaving here on Wednesday and be back in June. I have missed you guys and I'll be missing you more when I'm gone... I'll catch yah up when I get some time to go online, I just really need to spend a lil time with my kids  I've been busy working a lot and my Mom look after them when I'm so busy... good thing I have a great Mom like her  she's really a super Mom, wish I can be like her too! haha! I'm trying my best though (((blushes)))

Well, I see you soon guys! bye for now. Take care all and stay cute and smiling  

With much Love,

Twinkle*

Do you know that the best time to know yourself is when you're in LOVE?

You discover feelings you never knew you had. The heights of jealousy, passion, anger and affection. Its up to you to be a master or slave to them.

Committing into a relationship entails a lot of hard work to keep it because LOVE is an act of the will,
to live for another, to give oneself to meet the needs of another. Opening your heart means making room
for love, patience, understanding and sacrifice.

Loving a person is like that. Held loosely, with respect and freedom for the other person, it likely to remain
intact but hold too tightly, too possessively, and the relationship slips away and is lost. You never lose by loving.
You always lose by holding back.

Is it love?.... Probably NOT if...

Assumes the other person will change to please you. Causes feelings of insecurity or jealousy,
Appeared "love at first". Is easily forgotten when the other person is not around. Makes you feel "stressed out" when you're together.
Consumes your life, selfish,
seems to have peaked and is diminishing.
Limits other friendships.
Is based on partner's appearance,
Is based on feelings of possessiveness,
Has sexual gratification as its main goal.
Pressures you to do things you don't want to and blinds you to your partner's faults.

Maybe its LOVE.... if..

Accepts the other person as he or she is
Builds trust.
Started out as friendship
Lasts even when distance separates you.
Makes you feel relaxed and at ease with each other.
Allows you to do things without your partner
Makes you place your partner's needs before your own.
Gets stronger as time goes on. Allows you to have friends of both genders.
Considers appearance as only part of the attraction.
Recognizes the other person's individuality.
Is rewarding without a sexual component.
Allows you to reflect things that make you uncomfortable.
Accepts your partner's fault.

So... what is love??

In the great literature of all progressive societies, love is a verb. Reactive people make it a feeling. They're driven by feelings. Hollywood has generally scripted us to believe that we are not responsible, that love is a feeling. But the Hollywood script does not describe the reality. If our feelings control our actions, it is because we have abdicated our responsibility and empowered them to do so.

Proactive people make love a verb. Love is something you do: the sacrifices you make, the giving of self, like a mother bringing a newborn into the world. If you study love, study those who sacrifice for others, even for people who offend or do not love in return. Love is a value that is actualized through loving actions. Proactive people subordinate feelings to values. Love, the feeling itself, can be recaptured.

A long time ago, before the world was created and humans set foot on it,
God had put all the human "qualities" in a separate room.
Since all the qualities were bored they decided to play hide & seek.
"Madness" was one of the qualities and he shouted: "I want to count, I want to count!"
And since nobody was crazy enough to want to seek "Madness", all the other qualities agreed. So "Madness" leaned against a tree and started to count: "One, two,three... "
As "Madness" counted, the qualities went hiding.
"Treason" hid in a pile of garbage..
"Lie" said that it would hide under a stone, but hid at the bottom of the lake.
And Madness continued to count "... seventy nine, eighty, eighty one..."
By this time, all the qualities were already hidden except "Love ". For stupid as "Love" is, he could not decide where to hide. And this
should not surprise us, because we all know how difficult it is to hide "Love".
"Madness": "...ninety five, ninety six, ninety seven..." Just when "Madness" got to one hundred..... ...."Love" jumped into a rose bush where he hid
And Madness turned around and shouted: "I'm coming, I'm coming!"
As Madness turned around, "Laziness" was the first to be found, because "Laziness" was too lazy to hide. "Madness" searched madly and found "Lie" at the bottom of the lake. One by one, Madness found them all except Love. Madness was getting desperate, unable to find Love.
Envious of Love, "Envy" whispered to "Madness" "You only need to find Love, and Love is hiding in the rose bush."
"Madness" Jumped on the rose bush and he heard loud cry. The thorns in the bush had pierced "Loves" eyes. Hearing the commotion God came into the room and saw what had happened. He got very angry and cursed "Madness" and said
since "Love" has become blind because of u ...u shall always be with him"
And so it came about that from that day on,
"Love is blind and is always accompanied by Madness!"

Pity, sympathy, empathy, compassion. Each is received at various
times by one in distress. And each feels different when received.
Each has a different effect on those who are suffering in the midst
of psychic or physical crisis.

Of the four, compassion has a unique quality, a quality so different
from the rest that it connotes a certain spiritual as well as
emotional characteristic. Perhaps for this reason it is often cited
in spiritual/religious texts as a virtue to be sought and developed.

The recipient of compassion feels its superiority immediately.
Unlike pity, it has no condescension. Unlike empathy, it does not
require a past or present similar experience on the part of the
giver. And while sympathy is a wonderful virtue, it connotes less
spontaneity and variety than compassion; one would not normally
associate laughter or frivolity with sympathy, for example. And
there is also a certain distance or separation inherent in sympathy,
one sympathizes with the other. A very wonderful quality, still,
sympathy stands at a different level than compassion.

While sympathy is a tender response to misfortune or difficulty,
compassion is a way of life.

The dictionary offers the following root for compassion: Com (with) -
pati (to suffer), to suffer with.

But there is another definition, one that does not limit compassion
as a response to suffering, but rather to life itself, making it a
quality that one would live with in every situation, with every
person, rather than only with one who is in distress.

Com-passion: Com (with) - passion (strong feeling, enthusiasm); to
be with another in strong feeling and with enthusiasm.

Compassion, then, does not require sadness, sorrow or even the
desire to help, though it could include all these things. It simply
means being fully present with someone no matter the circumstances
of his or her life. Compassion suspends judgment and takes each
circumstance equally -- each as a moment of life to be lived in its
fullness. It . All possible emotions and feelings and behaviors of
which we are capable are inherent in every moment, in every
circumstance.

And so, compassion comes with no preconceptions. It has no
attitudes. It has no special face or tone of voice. It is not bound
by rules of behavior, decorum, expectations, though it may be guided
by all of these things.

Compassion is prepared to meet others wherever they are, recognizing
that the circumstance or challenge they now face is as much a part
of their life as any other part of their life. Compassion can laugh
or cry, joke or commiserate, be curious and inquisitive, chatty or
silent. Compassion is not afraid to be fully present, hopeful, or
lighthearted. Compassion does not turn away. It is never afraid to
see beauty or find humor or share a fractured heart.

Compassion contains no pity because it does not judge one
circumstance of life as better as or worse than the next. For it
comes from a place in which all things are from G-d's hand,
presented to us to be lived to its completion.

Compassion is not constricted by "rules" because it recognizes the
uniqueness of each instant and each person. As compassion opens the
door to visit the sick, it has no idea what lies ahead and so is
prepared for spontaneity, for the unexpected -- whether from the
patient or from itself.

Compassion creates its own result. As it interacts with the other, a
new thing happens, because compassion is prepared to yield to
whatever happens next, always with the other in mind.

Compassion is a spiritual quality often written about, rarely found
incarnate. Because to have compassion means to have full acceptance
of each circumstance in life. And this is very difficult to achieve.
Thus, those who have compassion are usually those who have a great
deal of varied experience and self exploration in their own lives.
They have suffered, they have struggled with their own inner demons,
they have met and known such a wide variety of people and touched
the humanity in each of them in so many different situations that
they can no longer judge and reject, neither person nor
circumstance. They have come to realize that life offers what it
offers and that each of us is all of us. Their self exploration has
revealed the worst of their demons, so that when they see the demon
in the other they can say hello.

And that is what compassion does: it simply says hello, with
kindness and grace. And because of this compassion is never a burden
to whom it is directed. Compassion is always welcome. It relieves
the sick or bereaved from the need to care for the visitor. It
relieves the one who is burdened from the added burden of being a
source of burden to the other. For compassion comes simply to say
hello, to be a companion in whatever circumstance presents itself.
Compassion has come to simply listen or laugh, to accompany whatever
is taking place without expectation or the need to make things
better. Because compassion believes that things are as they are
meant to be. And it believes that all circumstance can be shared.
Thus, compassion, when it enters, usually banishes loneliness, and
if not, it accompanies the lonely in their solitude.

Compassion can sit with the dying in silence, or with one giving
birth, marveling equally in the miracle taking place. Compassion can
join in suffering, accepting pain as a part of life. Compassion can
jump into action, if action is called for and desired. Compassion
can give to the poor or help heal the sick, without condescension or
judgment or lack of respect.

And if these qualities of compassion seem Divine, it is because they
are. And the only hope of ever calling this quality one's own is to
remember that it is in the image of the Divine that we are created.

And if ever you are fortunate enough to be in the presence of
compassion, you will barely notice it, so natural does it seem -- as
natural as G-d's hidden presence, noticeable only if you look.

We all know people who have really unrealistic expectations of relationships. So many hopeless romantics believe that love is the solution to life's problems. Many people confuse lust with love, over and over again. There are people who change lovers often, because they thrive on the excitement of the initial stages of love. These are just some of the more exaggerated examples that come to mind. Many of us have our own erroneous expectations about love. These expectations can set us up for disappointment down the road. What we believe about relationships affects our attitudes toward our relationships. If our expectations are unrealistic, we will inevitably be disappointed with our partners. Many people enter into relationships with the expectation that, if they find the right person, the relationship will take no work or effort. This is a totally unrealistic expectation. LOVE TAKES A LOT OF WORK.
 
In a new relationship, you are meeting another person's persona: the person that they most want you to see. As you get to know the person better, new layers of each of you emerge for one another to see. As the level of trust in the relationship grows, you both will expose deeper and deeper layers to one another. The deepest layers of each of us formed at a very young age, in response to childhood experiences. If your expectation is that relationships do not take work, then you probably are in for a major disappointment when the deeper parts of your partner's personality emerge. Temptation may come to leave and find a new, "better" partner.
 
You will find, however, that we are all the same: we all have deeper layers that hide under our socially acceptable personas. If you are unwilling to explore the deeper layers of your partner, or to reveal your own deeper layers, your relationships will remain superficial and unfulfilling. You will feel that something is missing… that your relationships are never intimate… that your partners never understand you… that you cannot understand your partners. You will be wondering why love seems to elude you. You will turn from person to person, looking for the "right" person, but never find him or her. You will never discover the real person that lies behind the mask of the persona in your current partner. You will never create the loving relationship that you desire, unless you are willing to put forth the effort to discover who your partner actually is, and to reveal your true self to your partner.
 
Many people believe that they understand the cliché, "love takes work." The question is, do they truly understand the meaning of "love takes work"? You will know that you are working at your relationship when you want to run away in frustration, but you stay and talk with your partner -- not just once, but repeatedly. Intimacy grows from the commitment and work that you put into your relationship. Of course, this is not to say that everyone is compatible with everyone else. However, once you have found a partner who meets certain parameters and seems compatible, the balance is 100% pure W-O-R-K.
 
A nice analogy for this process is that of mining for diamonds. On the surface, you can see certain signs that tell you that diamonds might be down there, somewhere below the surface. You decide to dig, and you invest all your time into digging. It is messy work. You feel like giving up, but all the signs on the surface insure you that there will be diamonds down there, somewhere. So you keep digging. Eventually, after a lot of time and a lot of effort, you find rough gemstones deep below the ground. How amazing that such beauty could be so far under the surface of the earth, under so much dirt. You are very glad that you persevered, instead of giving up in your search.
 
Relationships are exactly like this. Put the work into a relationship with the right person, and you will reap the love and intimacy benefits. When you have unrealistic expectations, you give up very early on in the relationship, without giving your partner or yourself a chance. You miss the opportunity to find the diamonds within your partner and within yourself. You will both feel cheated, and neither of you will really know why. Our expectations influence us, often without our even realizing it. It is important to recognize when your expectations are unrealistic and are interfering with your ability to form loving, intimate relationships. Changing your unrealistic expectations will seem foreign at first, because your beliefs have taken many years to form. Only through vigilance, hard work, and perseverance will you be able to change them, and to have more realistic expectations about loving, intimate relationships.
 
When you are considering whether someone is right or wrong for you, you must maintain your values, goals and lifestyle choices without serious compromise. As I have said before, communication is one of the most important components of a loving relationship. It is what allows us to rise in mature love with one another. Communication, the dialogue, the questions, and the answers: they all are key components in your effort to discover if your new partner meets your essential parameters for a long-term partner. Once you have determined that you wish to pursue a relationship, communication also is a key component in allowing the unlayering process to occur - as you unmask and show your deeper layers to your partner, and as you witness your partner while he or she unmasks and unlayers before you. Communication is an essential part of the work of any relationship.
 
A relationship is togetherness. You are one with your partner. As a couple, you have chosen to spend your lives united. The two of you travel life's journey, through its peaks and valleys, together -- so that you both might experience a loving, committed relationship, the type that we all seek today. As individuals, and as part of a couple, we all need to practice the art of loving daily. At all times, the art of loving requires from us patience, confidence, discipline, concentration, and faith. It is an attitude that we should live and present to the world through our daily thoughts, words, and actions. In a loving, committed relationship, you both must have this attitude. When you are both practicing the art of loving together, on a daily basis, this will allow you to experience a unique, fulfilling relationship that will be strong and resilient enough to endure any problems during your life's journey together. Finding the right person for you is only the beginning of this process. Without putting in the work, even the most perfectly matched couple's relationship eventually will fade. Many of us learn this the hard way, regretting that we did not work harder in a previous relationship while we still had the chance. Some of us find ourselves in another relationship, missing our old partner whom we know, in our heart, was the one for us.
 
Love is a two way street. It takes WORK from two individuals who are planning on starting a life together. It is a lifetime of work: so I caution you to recognize this now, rather than later. Take the time to know that you are indeed compatible with one another. Extinguish your fears. Have your priorities in order. Love one another to the highest degree. Keep digging till you find the diamonds within your partner, and your partner finds the diamonds within you. Have fun with one another, and enjoy a journey of passionate, committed, rising love together.

Relaxation time for me.... I'll be right back later!

hope yah all having a great time too :-)

gotta spend a little time with my kids outside, it's a FLY AWAY DAY for me  (lol)

Have a nice week sweet friends! forgive me if I don't sneak in ur pages this

past few days, been busy with some stuffs but believe me that I'm not forgetting YOU!

hugs and kisses****

twinkle*

It is not easy to live life sometimes and face the world with a smile when you're crying inside. It takes a lot of courage to reach down inside yourself, hold on to that strength that's still there, and kow that tomorrow is a new day - with new possibilities.

But if u can just hold on long enough to see this through, You'll come out a new person - stronger, with more understanding, and with new pride in yourself knowing you made it.

Here's an inspirational poem to remind us to take time. For the things that matter. Often, we rush through life, and forget to fill our gas tanks. To stop, liven, wonder, think, play, live, and love.

I would rather have one small rose
From the garden of a friend
Than to have the choicest flowers
When my stay on Earth must end.

I would rather have one pleasant word
In kindness said to me
Than flattery when my heart is still
And my life on Earth has ceased to be.

I would rather have a loving smile
From friends I know are true
Than tears shed round my casket
When this world I've bid Adieu.